It has been over 5 years since my accident. I continued to work part time for over 2 years. After the injury, the first thing to stop was any life perks, such as all social and recreational activiites as work and family responsibility was priority. By 2 years, I was so worn out from everything taking much longer to do, so part time was about 60 hrs a week.

 

Shortly after stopping work, my youngest child left for college. By now, friends had stopped calling for the most part. The social circle became very small. Even though I may look normal, I dont get jokes quickly or respond easily. I also recovered from some horrible depression. I also have other medical problems that limit me. Since Im not married and my parents are deseased, contact with my kids is often all there is.

 

I have spent a lot of my time searching for help to recover, but evidently west virginia is very far behind, I have found this website and participated in conversations, but gotten no response. I have contacted our local voc rehab, but they dont return calls. I have heard through this site that there is a mentoring program, but evidently not available to those outside washington state or there is something I cant figure out.

 

This network says at the top of the page "you are not alone" but it sure feels like it. I just dont get it-there are supposedly so many with brain injury and I dont know any, and after being on this site for a month and not one person that has been here taking the time to respond, I dont see any reason to waste any more time here. I am a member on a ptsd website and it is nothing like this, however, its not about head injury.

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The potential positive of the brain balancing therapy is that NOTHING is put into your body from an outside source - it is based on brain wave technology and sound stimulation.   I welcome the idea of a treatment that does not put any chemical, natural or not, into my body which already requires added chemcials to be "OK".  I'd like to get rid of all my meds if I could!

I'm new here as well... I have recently admitted to myself that I am definitely a different person since my TBI, and the isolation, I thought, was just me... but coming to this site, I see that it's not "just me"- it must be a TBI-related thing! You have no idea how much relief this has brought me. I have been forcing myself, for the last few months,, to get myself up and over to my best guy friends' house almost every night- JUST to have some human interaction- some laughs, some conversations, some SUPPORT! My friend has helped me tremendously... and to think, I had to force myself, and my friend put a lot of effort into getting me out of the house, and over to his place for some interaction... That sounds so silly to most people, but I can't believe how hard it was for me! Doing this has really helped me to feel more "normal"... Thank God or whomever for my friend, Jason :)

I am so sorry you feel that way, i get it we can be around a zillion people and we still feel alone unable to connect good luck me too i need it as well

I am new to this. My Mtbi happened on October 7, 2009. I got hit head-on on my way to work. To make a long story short I was teaching at a college and had just finished all of my work towards a PhD. Fortunately the writing was done but when I went back to teach almost a year later I lasted about 3 weeks before the docs pulled me out. The isolation has been very hard to deal with. I'm on long term disability now and havent worked to support my family since. Just a very tough experience - happy to find this group to be able to talk with others who understand how devastating it can be.  Thanks.

Oh wow, Matt! This sounds a lot like myself! And my accident was just months before yours- August 1st, 2009. I, too, had a great education, a great career as a nurse, and when I tried to go back to work after my recovery, I realized I wasn't the same person I used to be, and keeping up was difficult. I am still a very intelligent person. but there are some things that have really changed... I am struggling with getting my SSDI approved- You are so lucky they already approved you! I've been going through the process for almost 2 years now :( Anyway, just thought I'd say hello and tell you that I understand how you're feeling :)

Hi Matt and Kristien. Ok Wow, me too, I mean three. May 2009. I was assaulted by a patient on the job. Not an accident, but a very unfortunate happening. My TBI has been unending since 2009. Every day I say I am well, just like before and then find out with much discouragement, I am still TBI first, as the rest of life follows. I still have my full intelligence but am not able to express myself the same way and I tried to go back to work, but just sat there staring out the window doing nothing. I knew I needed more care. Nobody to help me. I came home to my children. Short lived, but they handled it well, overall and after some shock. The worst part for me was to lose the bonding with my children, but today I am most grateful to have a second chance almost like re-living to re-bond - it is better the second time! I live each day as gratefulness and hope my next boyfriend thinks I am ok. I do not want to be alone forever . . . . 

Hi Vicky. I agree, no meds or the fewest possible. We all seem to know that without being told. It is innate in our brains, the brains that keep us alive! I try everything that is external, also. Nutrition, yoga, PT, walking, acupuncture, acupressure, functional kenesiology, more. you are right!

Vicky Varichak said:

The potential positive of the brain balancing therapy is that NOTHING is put into your body from an outside source - it is based on brain wave technology and sound stimulation.   I welcome the idea of a treatment that does not put any chemical, natural or not, into my body which already requires added chemcials to be "OK".  I'd like to get rid of all my meds if I could!

I hear you Kristien. Sometimes I feel like I'm totally recovered and then I realize that I'm pacing myself at a nw always "slow" rate.  Fortunately my income comes from a short and now long-term disability policy from my former employer. Havent filed for SSDI. Thanks so much for your note.

Kristien Jones said:

Oh wow, Matt! This sounds a lot like myself! And my accident was just months before yours- August 1st, 2009. I, too, had a great education, a great career as a nurse, and when I tried to go back to work after my recovery, I realized I wasn't the same person I used to be, and keeping up was difficult. I am still a very intelligent person. but there are some things that have really changed... I am struggling with getting my SSDI approved- You are so lucky they already approved you! I've been going through the process for almost 2 years now :( Anyway, just thought I'd say hello and tell you that I understand how you're feeling :)

Hi Debbie:  Very sorry to hear about what happened to you. Yes, I share that feeling that I still have full intelligence but it's not the same. And dealing with not working is tough. Same here - I give thanks for my 2 daughters and my wife who is hanging in there with me through all of it.

Debbie Gibbons said:

Hi Matt and Kristien. Ok Wow, me too, I mean three. May 2009. I was assaulted by a patient on the job. Not an accident, but a very unfortunate happening. My TBI has been unending since 2009. Every day I say I am well, just like before and then find out with much discouragement, I am still TBI first, as the rest of life follows. I still have my full intelligence but am not able to express myself the same way and I tried to go back to work, but just sat there staring out the window doing nothing. I knew I needed more care. Nobody to help me. I came home to my children. Short lived, but they handled it well, overall and after some shock. The worst part for me was to lose the bonding with my children, but today I am most grateful to have a second chance almost like re-living to re-bond - it is better the second time! I live each day as gratefulness and hope my next boyfriend thinks I am ok. I do not want to be alone forever . . . . 

Hello to you I understand what u are saying. I am sorry u don't hav fam close to you it must be very trying. I have peps but still feel isolated and alone alot too. I just wanted to tell you hit me up anytime ok. kimmyann1669@hotmail.com. You aren't alone sweetie it's just people stay away from what they don't understand sometimes   Be safe take care hope to hear from you

Debbie Gibbons I sure liked the way you said that! Matt and Kristen now it is we 4 because I also tend to isolate. But when you really thibk about everything that has ereally been thrown at us it is amazing that any of us maintain our sanity let alone an occassional sense of humor.



Matt said:

Hi Debbie:  Very sorry to hear about what happened to you. Yes, I share that feeling that I still have full intelligence but it's not the same. And dealing with not working is tough. Same here - I give thanks for my 2 daughters and my wife who is hanging in there with me through all of it.

Debbie Gibbons said:

Hi Matt and Kristien. Ok Wow, me too, I mean three. May 2009. I was assaulted by a patient on the job. Not an accident, but a very unfortunate happening. My TBI has been unending since 2009. Every day I say I am well, just like before and then find out with much discouragement, I am still TBI first, as the rest of life follows. I still have my full intelligence but am not able to express myself the same way and I tried to go back to work, but just sat there staring out the window doing nothing. I knew I needed more care. Nobody to help me. I came home to my children. Short lived, but they handled it well, overall and after some shock. The worst part for me was to lose the bonding with my children, but today I am most grateful to have a second chance almost like re-living to re-bond - it is better the second time! I live each day as gratefulness and hope my next boyfriend thinks I am ok. I do not want to be alone forever . . . . 

Isolation can definitely keep you feeling alone.  When there is something out of kilter going on in the brain, it seems like you are no longer you.

There is a book called Coma, Key to Awakening by Arnold Mindell.  Thought TBI is different than coma, there are some great insights in the book that might help you feel better and less isolating.

If you struggle with reading, you could 1)read it just a little bit at a time (at your own speed) or 2) ask someone to record it for you so you can listen to it without reading it.

When I work with clients in coma, do palliative care with terminally ill clients or their surviving family members or clients stuck in PTSD flashbacks, I first tell them about EFT.

I encourage anyone feeling isolated to learn about Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).  A colleague of mine, Dr. Janice Smylie is an expert at using and teaching EFT.  It is a natural way to help you discharge the negative energy of thoughts holding you back.

Here are some links to her website to learn, for free, EFT:  http://www.janicesmylie.com/pages/03-eft.htm

http://www.janicesmylie.com/documents/JS%20PDF%20Docs/110929%20EFT-...

Here's a link to read about her:

http://www.janicesmylie.com/pages/01-meetjanice.htm

This is a lady who was in the hospital for 6 months after a car crash.  She had many face bones broken and other ones, too.  She is a sweet and knowledgeable therapist.  She lives in Canada.

Another thing you might consider is finding about another hypnotherapist in California who works with stress reduction, PTSD and trauma among other things.  She has a technique called the Easy Key To Life(TM) method.  It quickly helps you release negative thought energy keeping you feeling isolated, hopeless or otherwise stressed out.

I encourage you to listen to this fifteen minute, free, stress reduction meditation at this link.  Make sure you listen to it in a distraction free building or outside.  Do not drive any motorized vehicle or operate any machinery while listening to this recording: 

http://bit.ly/EKTLpub188

Lastly, please know that you are special, worthy of respect and of being included in this world just as you are.  There is nothing 'wrong' with your personal value because you experience TBI.  Instead please tell yourself that though you may currently be experiencing TBI and you are just as special as you were before you developed TBI.  Acknowledging that you are experiencing TBI never changes your personal value.

We are here with you!

Good luck.

Comatalker

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